The building I work in resides in old people land. High noon seems to be their active time of day and so when I run lunch time errands I often have run-ins with lots of them.
Today I wandered to Hy-Vee. I sat across a light from a little old lady who could barely see over the steering wheel. She had her left turn signal on which meant she would need to yield to me as I went straight through the light first. The light turned green and before I knew it she hit the gas so fast she burned rubber and turned left in front of me.
I ended my trip standing in line behind another elderly lady who had just pulled her phone out. While she loaded items onto the conveyor she screamed this this message into the phone: “Mark, I just bought you a schnitzel. You can eat it today or take it home. You don’t have to pay me back.” I couldn’t help but wonder if Mark would be excited or confused by said schnitzel.